juilan:

step on a crack, break your mother’s back, Lil’ Jon got the beat that make your booty go clap

jesuschill:

*dies trying to hit the high notes in Chandelier*

landorus:

cashier: that’ll be $4.20

me: bruh

cashier: bruh

roachpatrol:

i can’t get over how sad and funny it is when you see a teenage boy being real snotty about what he finds sexually attractive like oh no he doesn’t like bright lipstick and gladiator sandals make you look like a whore 

like buddy sorry you are not some kind of sexual wine connoisseur you are sixteen and would probably fuck a grapefruit

charmancler:

when your chemistry teacher gives you a bad grade

image

proctalgia:

i love when dogs sigh. its like, hey bud, long day at the office?

sassyabrahamlincoln:

do you ever get your period and just think about your recent behavior like wow that explains a lot

  • what i should be doing: homework
  • what i'm actually doing: tumblr

floatingmemories:

stop romanticizing the idea of becoming so dependent on another human being that you cannot function adequately without their presence goodbye